Normally, when it comes to Martha Stewart I think, "She's pretty first class. A little bit OCD and standoffish, but pretty classy with her good taste." Well that opinion has offically changed thanks to this little photo caption on her blog.

"Karena, my wardrobe mistress, painting the soles of my Louboutins black - I am not a fan of the signature red soles and always change the red to black - this is easy if you use a broad sharpie..."

Um ... a Sharpie? Didn't Julia Roberts use that same trick on her boots in "Pretty Woman"? Oh Martha, how far you've fallen.

Remember that episode of Sex & the City where Carrie makes fun of Berger for having one of his characters wear a scrunchie? He retaliates by telling her he hates her hat. That hat has nothing on this one, worn to the London premiere of Sex & the City. Let's hope this isn't the latest from the Bitten line.

... let us all bow our heads and be thankful we aren't this woman. Happy Mothers Day!

Checking in on my daily fix of celeb gossip, I came across the following headlines:

1. Nicole Ritchie Misses Partying Since Becoming a Mother
2. Holmes Enjoys Getting Manicures with Suri
3. JLo: Celeb Mom of the Year

Sigh. Celeb moms are so not like us.

I've never been what one would call a "good dancer." In fact, I'm godawful, and I'm pretty self-conscious about it. So the other night, when I went to see a local jam band play, I was perfectly willing to hang out by the pool table and drink my beer. Well, as these things happen, my friends and I ended up at the dance floor. And I couldn't help but catch a glimpse of this girl who was getting her funky on. Her dancing was a cross between Stomp, African Zumba, and "Rumpshaker." It was totally jacked-up and yet so awesome. It was then I realized that I, too, could dance like a hippie. In fact, next to that, I was Twyla freakin' Tharp. And I felt self-conscious no longer. In fact, I felt pretty fly. 

Hippies rule.

So wedding bells will be a ringing for Miss Scarlett and Ryan Reynolds. What do you guys think of this? She's 23, and though she's not a notorious "bad girl," a la Paris or Lohan, Girlfriend does like herself a hot romance. I personally can't see her settling down for too long. Do you agree?

A while back, I listed my five favorite S&TC episodes. In honor of Splendora's fashion slideshow and in anticipation of the movie coming out this month, I'm listing five more faves. Because really, how can you narrow the best ones down to five?

1. The one where Carrie has the bad sexytime with Harry's groomsman. Bonus points for Charlotte's Murphy's Law wedding starting with the "Hitler" moustache on her NYT wedding photo.
2. The one where Samantha dates the really old man. That wrinky ass gets me every time. Bonus points for Miranda meeting Steve.
3. The one where Samantha dukes it out with the sister of the guys she's seeing. Girlfriend can throw down. Bonus points for Charlotte dating the really bad kisser.
4.  The one where Charlotte kisses the gardner. You truly get a feel for how vile the McDougal family is. Bonus points for drunk Bunny lighting her cigarette on the wrong side.
5. The one where Charlotte dates the "gay-straight" guy. I love the brilliance of the guy setting the mood by playng Cher. Bonus points for Carrie passive aggressively leaving all her stuff at Big's place and "doing a number two."

A couple weeks ago, I realized that having a baby has changed my body in more ways than one. Aside from a little pooch in my lower abs that won't go away, I've discovered "the girls" have become more like "the old broads."  Yeah, you moms out there know what I'm talkin' about. As I tried on my bikini from my pre-preggo days, I realized to my dismay, the triangle top that looked so cute two years ago was a NIGHTMARE. Like "There's Something About Mary" next door neighbor bad. I ended up wearing a tank top to my daughter's swim class, because nobody needs to see that spectacle. And a bathing suit shopping trip made matters even worse, because bathing suits apparently are designed for two body types: perfect body and matronly grandma. But there's hope! I found this suit (the top is pictured) randomly at some teeny bopper store, and it's perfect. It has a little bit of lift, hides side cleavage, and even has a strap for times when the 6-month-old wants to tug at Mommy's top. And I love the black and white/pink combo. I wore it to swim class last week, everything stayed in place, and I didn't feel self-conscious at all.  Hooray!

Okay, I'll admit it. I'm not very "green," especially when it comes to transportation.  I drive an SUV, seldom carpool, and fill up in the middle of the day (a big no-no in AZ summers). Our public transport system is deplorable, so I never use it. Over the weekend, I watched this show, What if: the Oil Runs Out. The docudrama gives a series of "worst case scenario" scenes of what life would be like in 2016 once we've reached our peak of oil production. The result is grim, showing long lines at gas stations to fill up on gas that costs $4.60 a gallon, as well as stealing gas, fighting over it, and all kinds of strife that comes with a fuel shortage. These scenes are fictional, speculative and over-the top dramatic, however, it got my husband and I talking about how much we rely on fuel and how screwed we'd be if we didn't have it. Though it's not in the budget to replace our vehicles with hybrids, and our conflicting work schedules aren't condusive to carpooling, we did make a pact that for one month, when we go out or entertain, we will only go to places where we can walk or ride our bikes. It won't save an impending fuel crisis by any means, but it will get us out in the fresh air and sunshine, and might make a difference in how much gasoline we use on a weekly basis. I can't help but think if everyone in our city did the same thing, how much fuel would be spared. Gallons and gallons.

I admit: ever since I downloaded iTunes a few years ago, my trips to record stores have been few and far between. Though I might have to change this tomorrow, as it's Record Store Day. Gritty, indie record stores are a dying breed, and they deserve their due props.  And don't forget good "record store" movies, which include High Fidelity, Pretty in Pink, and Empire Records.